Our lives forever changed in March of 2017. Years after stepping away from fertility treatments, we got pregnant naturally. After doctors told us it probably wouldn’t happen, it did. As many of you know, we lost Lil Bit at 10.5 weeks. You can read more about our precious Lil Bit’s story here.
As March started this year, I have found myself feeling sad. Life has been STRESSFUL lately. I have just been exhausted from trying to keep up with everything. When stress piles up, I am quick to start feeling sorry for myself. Stress, being exhausted and feeling sorry for myself is not a good mix for me. It’s a mix that can lead me to a dark place.
The due date for our first baby is also in March. (You can read the story of our first baby, sweet Trudy, here.) Around this time last year, I was chatting with a friend about how I wasn’t ready for Trudy’s due date. I distinctly remember telling my friend that I was so tired of the journey. I believed that we could get pregnant, I just wasn’t excited about facing another big date with an empty womb.
On that day my friend reminded me that God can change our lives suddenly. In an instant everything can change. She encouraged me to cling to hope as our suddenly was coming.
Days after that conversation, suddenly happened and we learned we were pregnant. Our lives were forever changed that day. Suddenly we were carrying our second baby. Suddenly I went from dreaming about living room paint colors, to nursery paint colors. Suddenly we were thinking about what it would be like to add a tiny little human to our world.
The definition of sudden is “occurring or done quickly and unexpectedly or without warning.” When I think about the day that we found out we were pregnant with Lil Bit, I still have to smile. I had spent years begging God for a miracle baby. However, suddenly I was holding that positive pregnant test feeling so unprepared. Sometimes, I think no matter how much we prepare, miracles can still hit us suddenly and turn us upside down.
A few days ago I was texting with my sweet friend, and she asked me how my heart was as we entered March. I was honest with her, and shared that I was feeling a bit sad. My friend reminded me of the conversation we had a year ago. Suddenly, in one instant, everything can be different.
To be honest, reading her texts did encourage me…for the short term. As the day went on, and I became more busy and more stressed, I forgot the encouragement. However, I didn’t forget the word “suddenly”. It hung around in my heart and jumped around in my mind. So, this weekend I decided to pull out my bible concordance and look up all the times the bible uses that word.
In Matthew 28:1-8, the bible describes the resurrection. In this chapter, the women who meant the most in Jesus life were going to care for his body after his death. As they were going to the tomb, the stone rolled away and Jesus rose from the dead. When the women got to the tomb, an angel appeared to them and told them not to fear because the Lord had risen. The angel told the women to run to see to tell the disciples. So the women ran and praised God. Then, in verse 9, it says “Suddenly Jesus met them.”
I have read this story literally a million times, but this time it felt new. These women had just watched Jesus die. I can’t imagine what that must have felt like. I am sure they felt like a lot of their hope and dreams had died with Him. As they walked to the tomb, I imagine they must have been tired, wondering what happens next. They believed Jesus was their Messiah, but maybe they misunderstood? Maybe they made that up?
When the women got to the tomb, they found it empty. An angel said “He isn’t here. He is risen.” They hadn’t seen Jesus yet, they had simply been told he had risen. A promise was given, the promise that Jesus was going before them to Galilee. They immediately started praising God and went to run to tell everyone. After the promise and after the praise… that is when Jesus suddenly met them. The suddenly came AFTER the promise and AFTER the praise. Here’s the cool part, the miracle had already happened. Before the angel promised that Jesus would meet them and before the women started praising… Jesus had already risen from the dead.
A few days ago, Dan pointed out that our flower beds are starting to bloom. Something about new growth always fills my heart with so much hope. Maybe I’m the only one, but new growth always seems so sudden. It feels like one day we go to bed and it’s winter, and the next morning we wake up to fresh new growth. Even though that growth feels unexpected, the reality is that new growth had been growing for weeks before I ever saw it.
Today, I want to encourage you that no matter what you are praying for and no matter how long you have prepared, Jesus hasn’t forgotten you. Your suddenly may be just one prayer away. More than that, I want to encourage you that Jesus has already gone ahead of you. He has already prepared a way for that miracle to come. Today, I encourage you to praise Him while you wait. Praise Him before your suddenly.